Again, I saw this letter quiz/meme thing going around, and thought this one had insane amounts of potential with inside jokes, so here's a re-written version of it.

(Note: Yes, the jokes may get more diverse as it goes on because I started to remember more of them. I hope it's ok if they start out from one or two sources and then spread out as things go on.)

Also: It says to adress the fake 'letter' to the last person who commented on your journal, but anyone who bothers to steal this might as well address it to me, as I'm the only one who'll really get the jokes, anyway. >_>;

Anyway, here it is.

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(My finished 'letter' when I did the quiz: )


Dear :

I don't really know how to tell you this, but Grenth is a purple kitty. I think I realized it when we were nearly murdered by that sentient bed-and-breakfast in rural Arkansas in the Thousand-Year Bathroom and I saw you paint happy figs all over Avrelle's miniature pet lich. I'm sure you're speshal enough to understand why mesmers and cars don't get along. I'm returning the army of line-dancing penguins to you, but I'll keep the secret of Wisyhode Pissingly's real identity as a memory. You should also know that I am now officially terrified of the barrel of cheese .

Forever dreading the wrath of Grenth the Purple Kitty and his Eternal Bathroom,

Lunar

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RULES:

Do the "Letter MEME" by answering the questions and putting the words/phrase that correspond to your answer in the correct blanks.

Afterwards, post the entire thing, including the finished 'letter' in your journal.

-> How you do the Letter Meme:

Dear (the last person to comment on your journal):

I don't really know how to tell you this, but ___1___. I think I realized it ___2___ ___3___ and I saw you ___4___ ___5___. I'm sure you're ___6___ enough to understand ___7___. I'm returning ___8___ to you, but I'll keep ___9___ as a memory. You should also know that I ___10___ ___11___ .

___12___,

-Sign/Type your name here-

1. What's the color of your shirt?
Blue - Your future will be slightly blue with a ton of parsley! @_@
Red - I know you've been abusing the Magic Remote
White - Mhenlo is not 'The Monk'
Black - Grenth is a purple kitty
Green - I got kicked out of Ald-ruhn for stealing a piece of paper
Grey - The fadey thing is broken again
Yellow - I secretly like to nibble on Nord Cheese Shrines
Pink - I just ruined Palawa's new pink ball gown
Brown - You have angered the mighty Lord Snippy
No shirt - I think I just glitched reality
Other - I hide knifes in my pajamas


2. Which is the most boring month?
January - That one especially lunar night
February - During that one AB with the Dreaded AB Singer
March - When Pancake wouldn't stop poking me
April - When I was attacked by the Winking AIM Smiley
May - Two teddy bears ago
June - When Leiber's wife got mad
July - When the apples invaded
August - When we were nearly murdered by that sentient bed-and-breakfast in rural Arkansas
September - When I got run over by a wheelbarrow
October - When the ship got pulled over for drunken flying
November - When Danika flipped out and went on that murderous rampage through the cathedral
December - When I overdosed on the Hyper Potion


3. Which food did you last eat?
Tacos - In the Corprus Stalker Disco
Pizza - In the tuna can
Pasta - On the outskirts of Retardville
Hamburgers - Under a very small couch
Salad - As you tortured someone with a persimmon
Chicken - In the Thousand-Year Bathroom
Kabob - With Machine Gun-Happy Bowser
Fish - In a small, pink towel
Sandwiches - At the studio when Ember was being interviewed
Lasagna - On Moonsugar Day
Hot dog - Under the influence of Nyquil
None of the above - During the Argonian Pants Quest


4. What's the color of your shoes?
Yellow - Poke
Red - Insult
Black - Interview
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Run over
White - Set fire to
Grey - Drop a barrel of cheese on
Brown - Put a dress on
Orange - Lay seige to
Pink - Steal
Barefoot - Nibble on
Other - Paint happy figs all over


5. What's the color of underwear you would be least-willing to wear under ANY circumstances?
Black - Master Togo
White - Lord Snippy
Grey - Prince Rurik
Brown - Psycho-Colette
Purple - Remoose the Ancient Typo God
Red - QAAAARRRG
Blue - A Nord Cheese Shrine
Yellow - Galcian's flagship
Orange - An Oatronus
Pink - Lord Big-e-Foot
All of the above, except plain old white - Yerah
Other - Avrelle's miniature pet lich

(Other being, in my case, a couple of different *combinations* of these colors that I cringe just thinking about.)

6. What do you think is THE most annoying/stupid-looking show on TV?
Scrubs - Purple
O.C. - Undead
One Tree Hill - Pointy and Fuchsia
Heroes - Confuzed
Lost - Slightly blue
House - Disoriented
Simpsons - Shouty
The news - Lunar
American Idol - Speshal
Family Guy - Redundant
Top Model - Pyro
None of the above - Furry


7. Your mood right now?
Happy - How bad of a minion master you are. >_>;
Sad/Disappointed/Blah/etc. - That dementors have grass growing out of their cloaks, and it needs to be mowed.
Bored - That water does, indeed, make a splashy sound.
Angry - That we do not, never have, and never will, sell alcohol at this establishment.
Tired - Why mesmers and cars don't get along.
Excited - Why your navigation should be banned. >_>;
Nervous - How it affects the rest of us when you forget your potion.
Worried - That Professor Frankly tends to *do* that when he misses a note on his xylophone. o_o;
Apathetic - That even Razah can be bored when Captain Asshole is involved. >_>;;
Ashamed/Embarrassed - Just how bad Varesh's Nyquil binges can actually be. o_o
Cuddly - That the Immaturity Blight is completely incurable.
Overjoyous - That, contrary to popular belief, I truly had *no* involvement in the plunger-jousting incident. >_>
Other - Why Pancake should NEVER, EVER be a monk. o_o;


8. What's the one color you could NEVER stand your walls in your bedroom to be?
White - The Wheeled Stepladder of Ascalon
Yellow - Mewaru
Red - These flaming pantyhose
Black - The Norwegian Shoe Lemmings
Blue - The lockpick
Green - Creeper's Magic Icicle Gun
Orange - Pancake's special knifes
Brown - 'Nibbles'
Grey - Darth Vader's black moa
Purple - Ald-ruhn's missing piece of paper
Pink - Ald-ruhn
Other - The army of line-dancing penguins

(...god...it's almost a toss-up between brown and yellow...so...other? @_@ )

9. The first letter of the last word you typed?
A/B - Moody's wooden leg
C/D - Yerah's splinter
E/F - Palawa's new pink ball gown
G/H - The persimmon
I/J - All your foursies
K/L - The Plum on Squeaky Little Wheels
M/N - Roof dolphins
O/P - 'Buggles'
Q/R - Ceh's beloved signpost
S/T - The barrel of cheese
U/V - The Magic Remote
W/X - The extra Scepter of Orr
Y/Z - The secret of Wisyhode Pissingly's real identity


10. The last letter in the last word you typed?
A/B - Will forever rue the day that I encountered
C/D - Will unfortunately NEVER be able to forget
E/F - Would really like to curse
G/H - Want to suicide-jump into Red Mountain when I think of
I/J - Kind of lied about my involvement in
K/L - Will be sure to inform Lord Galcian about
M/N - Was mentally-scarred by
O/P - Was interviewed by NTV (Nord Televison) about
Q/R - Was the one who stole
S/T - Have been tramatized by
U/V - Have a deep-seated desire to bludgeon
W/X - Was solely responsible for
Y/Z - Am now officially terrified of


11. What was the last thing you had to drink?
Water- The barrel of cheese.
Root beer - Konk in a wedding dress.
Coke- Bob the Tarantula.
Dr. Pepper - angry Jade with a hammer.
Milk - Auntie Genis's Radiator Muffins.
Sprite - Leiber.
7-Up - The *real* reason Frodo went to Mount Doom.
Juice - The Beep Beep Broom.
Mineral water - The six-inch step that Link fell off of and died instantly.
Coffee - The Argonian Garbage Truck
Hot chocolate - The Song of Torment.
Alcoholic drink(s) - The Almighty Power of Scotch Tape.
Other - The Master of Whispers in a Mermaid Man costume.


12. To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand - I hope the fig patterns eventually come off
USA - Forever dreading the wrath of Grenth the Purple Kitty and his Eternal Bathroom
England - I hope your palace gets flattened by Ember and Buggles' playtime
Spain - Still questioning the fishie's bigness
China - Khajiit loving it...@_@
Germany - Hope you brought cookies
Japan - Cheese. >= (
Greece - Remember, it's not Tuesday
Australia - Remembering that cheese leaves an evil and nasty aura indeed
Egypt - What in the name of Holy Rabbit Dogs is going on here!? >= (
France - It's not what you think... O_O;
Other - OOOOOOOOH YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAH~!
More than one/Tie/I don't know - The Pununs were soon swept into scpruti oil. And inns.

(...hey, who NEEDS the hassle of dealing with flying overseas when there's lots of stuff here? >_> )

(<_<; ...sorry...I just HAD to add that one last one onto the end because it seemed like a good idea at 3 AM.)